Better Beliver

     Why does the heart want what it does? When I get in world, I am almost always excited. The promise of romance is always on my mind. But in the circles I move in, I am daily reminded that there is almost no one who wants that kind of commitment, at least with yours truly. The sense of jadedness encroaches ever deeper, and I find myself becoming withdrawn once the initial burst of pixels is dressed for the evening.

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     I can’t help it though. I am on my flikr looking and favorite images of couples, friends in my SL list are paired off happily. The very idea of partners has always been a sought after thing as I met and even dallied with people through the time I been in world. So, why does the heart want wot it wants?

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      Random sex is empty for me. Hollow and unsatisfactory, but for the overwhelming bulk of people in my community ( TG ) it is the main way people spend their time. I don’t judge anyone for logging in for that, but I also can’t help thinking wot a waste of potential. I guess each person finds happiness in their own way. I try to be more like them, but it never works for me. Each time I get involved I end up wishing I hadn’t. I turn inward, and go towards the one thing I actually do okay at… Spinning music.
     I was playing a song the last set I spun. It sparked a brief flurry of conversation about love and togetherness. A person was taken aback by the song, particularly when I called it the SL TG anthem. The chorus was ” My heart belongs to you, there is nothing that I won’t do, yes my heart belongs to you..but my cock is community property”..             I guess I should stay out of those conversations.

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